There is nothing fun about having to take a kid to the ER. Add autism to the mix and that makes it all that much less funner.
We had to take Bianca to the ER… again. Last time it was a broken foot, this time it was a REALLY infected finger. I just hate it. Nothing makes me feel worse than having to hold Bianca down while she is freaking out as doctors and nurses do stuff to her.
|Yuck. It was bigger by the time we got to the ER.|
It goes against everything in my makeup. I spend the vast majority of my time with Bianca working towards avoiding meltdowns. There is no option in the ER though. She is going to meltdown. She is going to get upset. She is going to hate me. I just hope that she forgives me.
How do you explain it an autistic child though? I tell her throughout the ordeal that I am sorry and that I love her. I repeat to her that we are trying to help her and make her feel better… but I still feel like a monster.
For her finger, they had to numb it and then make an incision to drain the puss. This did not go over well. Just putting the numbing cream on her finger and wrapping it so that she would not mess with it was a battle. She put up such a fight that she wore herself out. She jumped back in the wheelchair (she LOVES wheelchair… which is kinda why we want one) gathered all her stuffed animals into her arms and laid on them. Within minutes she was asleep.
|Meltdowns wipe me out.|
It was horrible. They had to put her on a body board restraining device. Then I also laid over her, my wife had her feet and two nurses had her torso... did I mention that she was already on a restraining board?
Bianca looked at me with eyes that screamed, “HELP ME! MAKE THEM STOP!”
Pouring on the guilt trip, as soon as the procedure was over she came to me to be held. Reality must have kicked in pretty quick though, because it didn’t last. She wanted back down to the wheelchair and her stuffed animals.
She fell asleep pretty quickly once we got home. I am sure she thought the worst was over and had a sense of relief… little did she know, tomorrow started the medicine.