Saturday, June 18, 2011

A Father's Day Celebration: Members Only

For this post, I would like to pay tribute and thank all the fathers out there that love their autistic children unconditionally. This is for the dads that have what it takes to be a real man and stand by your family and take your vows seriously. This is for the dads that don’t run from their child being different, and for those that may just now be coming to the realization that they are entering a club that they had no plans on joining.

For many in a marriage, an autism diagnosis can be placed in the “worse” column of “for better or for worse”, but with patience and communication you can survive. Don’t bottle up your fears. Tell your wife, your friends, or share them with others in a blog and you will free yourself of the many burdens you are trying to shoulder and find strength in numbers.

You know that you are the father of an autistic child when:
  •  You know exactly what your child is saying even though she has never said it… EVER.
  • You go to visit your friends who have children and they apologize for how their kids are behaving, yet you never even noticed.
  • You have ever worn more of your child’s food then he has eaten, and he is 6.
  • You have ever tried “stimming” just to see what it is all about.
  • Using just your peripheral vision, you can snag crayons from your child’s hand before they go in the mouth.
  • You are on a plane with a crying child... and don't even notice.
  • You see a kid being a complete terror at the grocery store and you do not judge.
  • You have been punched in the face by your child and instead of getting angry, you laugh it off.
  • Your child saying, “I love you” even if by echolalia makes you feel like you are the king of the world.
  • You have eaten a family dinner in the dark on several occasions.
  • You have shared belly laughs with a child that you have no reason as to why they are laughing.
  • You have been given every crackpot theory about what causes autism and what will make your child better, and have kept yourself from going insane.
  • Your child has taught you greater patience, understanding, empathy & compassion than you ever thought possible.

Got any more out there? Go ahead and lay them on me! 
Join in the fun and let’s celebrate! You guys deserve it! 

If you have not already, please take time to watch my videos, "Fixing" Autism and Autism Awareness with Nichole337 and share them with your friends.

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Thursday, June 16, 2011

Not Those moments... These Moments.

If you have an autistic child, you find that not only does the condition fill you with concern for your child that is autistic; it does the same for subsequent children.

One of the cruelest and earliest symptoms of autism for some is regression. You have a perfectly happy and healthy baby that is hitting milestone after milestone, and then suddenly he/she is not. You also start to realize that skills your child used to have, are now lost or a struggle to achieve.

Bianca was about a year old when we noticed that she wasn't responding to her name as much. We just assumed that she was REALLY involved with whatever it was she was doing and was blowing us off.  A very brave friend of ours that used to work with special needs children brought to our attention that her behavior seemed abnormal and could be warning sign. I say “brave” because it takes a lot of courage to tell a friend of yours that you think that there MAY be something wrong with their child. It takes even more strength when you take into consideration that he knew of our struggle to have children. We had lost multiple pregnancies, my wife discovered she had a medical condition contributing to her struggle with maintaining a pregnancy and Bianca’s time in the womb was riddled with complications.